As an author, you often spend time in solitude, with your laptop or other tools. Most authors are introverts and prefer being in solitude. That makes sense; you’re alone, and you need that time away from other people, so you can concentrate. But even if you’re an introvert, don’t you some-times feel like you’re floating Out There, disconnected?
Perhaps you even feel lonely. Many authors feel intellectually lonely. They’re missing trusted souls with whom to toss around ideas, not just for plots, characters, themes and points, but for book promotion ideas and tips on the latest in social media.
So how would you find such people? How do you develop connections? Especially if you just hate socializing? Here are five ways, ranked from least challenging to most challenging, for an introvert.
1. Go to signings, talks or classes and just observe from the back. Start by reading this newsletter. Really read it, looking for announcements of events the members of this Association offer, and events the organization itself offers (See #2). There is an incredible array of knowledge and talent in this organization. Pick a short event to start, like a signing or a morning talk at a library. You don’t have to chat with anyone. Just get some new ideas, listen to the questions and answers. Start thinking of questions you would like to ask: authors’ writing schedules, traditional publishers versus independent publishing, illustrating, niche areas for writers, copyrights and trademarks, development of characters, use of colorful language, setting scenes. The possibilities are endless. Make a lot of notes on areas in which you would like to connect with more information and/or some support.
| Book signing at the Glendale Chocolate Affaire (Romance) |
2. Visit a writers’ club. The Arizona Authors’ Association has different kinds of gatherings from time to time, including table sharing at some book festivals. Other writers’ groups may have speakers at dinner meetings. At any of these events, you can enrich your knowledge of writing, publishing, and marketing. And you can smile at the people on either side of you, if you like. When you feel comfortable, start asking your questions. Authors are generally kind and helpful. You may be surprised at the ease you begin to feel.
3. Find a Meetup. Go to Meetup.com and search for writers’ groups and book clubs. Take as long as you like to look over the programs they’ve been having and the location, level and nature of each group. Some are more like classes and some are open-format. You might like to start with a book club, simply to meet nice people who like books. Look around for groups in your area. Sleep on it. Then pick something and try it out. You may find kindred souls and friends for a lifetime, through reading the same book or sharing ideas. Smile when you feel good. Smiles connect people.
4. Make friends at book festivals. Book festivals require no commitment on your part, as an attendee. It’s fun to wander through, listening to each writer’s stories and their passions about their books. If you’re already published, be brave and sign up to sell or share a sales table. Ask your table mate or a nearby author to take quick photos of you and your display. Study their display, ask about it, and offer to take photos for them. Find out what got them started in writing and in writing their present book or series. You may find you’ve not only met a delightful new friend, but you’ve also found another form of writing you would like to explore. If the book festival has speakers, take in as many of those as you can. The people sitting near you will have interests similar to yours, and trading comments may lead to laughs, coffee, and possible future connections. You will enjoy seeing them again at other book events. Find out what events or classes they enjoy. Which would you also enjoy?
| Tucson Festival of Books (annual event in March) |
5. Join or start a critique group. Whatever your niche, it’s very mind-opening to have a critique group made up of writers with projects totally unlike yours. The very fact that these people cannot be your competitors may make you more comfortable with them and their observations. Give the group at least 6 months. Remember, it isn’t simply the critiquing you’re there for. It’s the mixing and mutual support. It’s the stimulation and learning. By now, you may be finding you’re offering advice and even mentoring others.
Feel your smile dancing across your face as you enjoy the ride of authorship more and more. And notice your productivity rising as you realize you now are getting the stimulation, connection, and support you need. To connect, try some events. See how fun and varied the world of writing is. Realize how interesting and often witty the other authors can be.
Kebba Buckley Button is a stress management expert. She also has a natural healing practice and is an ordained minister. She is the author of the award-winning book, Discover The Secret Energized You plus the 2013 book, Peace Within: Your Peaceful Inner Core, Second Edition. Her newest book is Sacred Meditation: Embracing the Divine. Both that book and Peace Within are available through her office. Email books@kebba.com.
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